(209.) Food for Thought: When Launching a Business (Series Part 3) – Finances

Many people are artists, inventors, designers, visionaries and want to leave “bean-counting” to someone else with a fancy looking calculator and a pocket protector.  Incidentally, I endured much good-natured ribbing since I used to carry around my old high-school graphing calculator. My colleagues joked that it had nuclear code capability. I was attached to it, though, since I was used to the buttons and knew where they were without looking.  My other favorite device in B-school was my handy number pad (the USB kind you plug into your laptop).  I got made fun of for using that, too, but I stick by my assertion that it makes number entry SO much faster.

If you fall into the category of person who would be amused by my calculator and number pad the important thing for you to do in answering Question 3 (“How do I approach finances?”) is to start approaching finances somehow.  I’m not going to be picky here – just buckle down and start thinking about it.  Don’t be scared.  You HAVE to do this in order to sustain the creative activity you are made for, so just start and you’ll feel so much better – when you have addressed finances you’ll feel free to attend to your core business.

So these thoughts are just starting points to help you not feel overwhelmed if you’ve decided to get a grip on your business’s finances and are not sure where to start.  Let me break this into two goals:

• Goal 1 (past-oriented records):  Keep your books clean so your accountant can work with them easily (I can’t help you here bc I always confuse debits and credits – accounting is not my forte).  Communicate with your accountant so you know what (s)he needs.  If you do not have a good accountant, make it a priority to get one – you need to be square with the government. Note:  If you cannot BE the ninja, KNOW the ninja.
• Goal 2 (future-looking projections):  Get a good idea of your revenue and expenses so you know if you’re going to make money in the future or not, and what you have to do to turn a profit.
  • Expense Categories:  Decide on categories that encompass all of your expenses. This will allow you to track them accurately as you sort every dollar that goes out the door into piles, and then size the piles so you know how much it costs to keep your venture running.  Examples:  Travel & Entertainment, Continuing Education/Licensing, Materials, Office Space Rental, Office Supplies, etc.
  • Revenue Unit:  What is a good “unit” to work with?  Depending on the business it could be a burrito, a book, or the hourly rate for an evening of babysitting.
  • What are the costs attached to each unit?  What is your pricing scheme?  Per room, a % of costs, etc.?

 A note on Pricing:  Do your homework and know what the market value of your product/service.  What are your competitors charging?  If you charge above this you should be able to clearly point to the extra value your business provides – the surcharge is simply the monetization of that extra value.  If you are charging below market value you must make sure that a) this price cut is NOT perceived by your customers as a discount for a product or service of inferior quality, and b) you can make up the deficit by the increased volume of sales you’ll see because of your low price strategy.

The goal is not to break even – it’s to turn a profit.  But it might take a while for this to happen, and it would be good theoretically to know how many sales you must make to break even since it’s a good mental milestone.  You just want to make sure you’re not throwing money at a losing proposition for X years while your family goes hungry because you’re busy pursuing your dream but have counted the cost ineptly.  If your dependents are extremely supportive of your dream and are okay with making some sacrifices in order to see it become a reality, that’s wonderful – but you still want to have some sort of idea of how long they are going to have to tighten their belts so you can make an informed decision regarding whether or not to take the plunge.

49. Did she really just say that?

It’s time for me to self-illustrate, but I can’t this time because 100% of the profits from Learning How… (in any format or language) will go to a good cause.  I am not sure of the language to use – I mean to say that they will go to a government-recognized organization that is non-profit or not-for-profit.  The funds will not be going to the Charity of Me.  Although I’ve heard of many people who, when faced with unexpected illness, accept donations for their medical/living expenses – and this is a good thing since if you can’t work bc you’re injured/sick, where are you and your family supposed to get money from?  If I were in this kind of situation I’d tell you.  But I have been blessed to be in a situation that does not necessitate fundraising (at present). Instead, I’ll offer you a product (my “Memoirs”) in return for a price – it’s your decision whether or not to purchase.  As I’ve said before, there’s actually very little overlap between this blog and my “Memoirs” – I know, you’re like, Seriously?  What else could she possibly have to say?  Answer:  Many, many things.

To be clear, Ed Goes to D.C. and anything else I come up with are not part of my “Memoirs”  (right now I’ve got Volume 1 written, and am waiting for more stuff to happen so I can write Volume 2). All revenue will be categorized and recognized appropriately – don’t worry, Tanpo is going to help me.  One more thing – I mentioned different formats/languages in the paragraph above.  I have enlisted some multilingual friends who will graciously translate Learning How… into Mandarin and Spanish.  I also researched options for a low-tech audio book and figured it would be a good use for my voice if I did it myself, plus I’d love to offer an accessible option like this…but given my upcoming vocal cord intervention I’m having second thoughts.

Don’t you love how I’m referring to it as “intervention” and not “surgery”?  Aaah – the soothing use of euphemisms helps me face the reality that I’m going back to the hospital without really facing it.  But this is exactly what I’m telling you NOT to do – don’t practice avoidance like I do – just jump into the financial pool.  The shock of the water might take an adjustment but you’ll feel more comfortable once you just climb in.  Don’t just get your toes wet, either – do a cannonball.  Better you than me.  🙂

 

 

 

(204.) Food For Thought: When Launching a Business [Series part 2]

Before you enter the field you want to know who’s already there and if your product/service is good enough to hold its own.  Do your homework!  The internet makes it easy to get a good start – Google, Amazon, etc. will give you an overview.  You should also go to some sites that people interested in your field congregate at and see what they’re talking about – e.g. is there a cool new product Moms are talking about on a popular Mommy blog?  Are tufted fabric headboards popular now, or do people like wooden ones?  How do men carry things when they travel without carrying a purse?  If the messenger bag is a popular solution, what kinds of options are already in the market?

If your offering is a product you could also go to the store and just look at what’s already on the shelves at local big box retailers.  Would yours be a compelling option to a consumer pushing a cart down that aisle?  (We’re suspending reality a moment and pretending you’re so amazingly fortunate as to have your product in a hard-to-break into distribution channel; seriously, though – if you can’t imagine your product being a fantastic option on that shelf you’ll have nothing to say to the stores’ merchandise buyers, so definitely ask yourself this question.

If your offering is a service make sure you know who your competitors are and why you can do the job better than they can.  There could be some debate on this point, but you probably don’t want to alienate your competitors by saying things like, “You are awful at what you do,” or telling prospective customers that everyone else is amazingly incompetent because it’s possible you could need their help in the future, or a collaboration might be in order on a project one day.  So play nice, but position yourself well so you can play hard.    You’re playing for keeps here – this is your livelihood we’re talking about, and you could have a family of people depending on you.

An easy way to visualize the playing field and your position on it is to draw a picture.  I think a concept exists for illustrating several attributes at once (a “spider chart”), but this is too intricate for me to dive into now.  For ease of use and clarity of thought, let’s look at a simple attribute chart.  Pick 2 attributes that are important and draw an x-y axis with negative space so you have quadrants.

To illustrate – let me refresh your memory on Parking 101.  This is not strictly an attribute map of a “playing field,” but I just want to show you what I mean by “negative space” and “quadrants” – sorry, I don’t know how to describe it.

Now put points on your attribute map representing the key players on the field and add one for yourself.  Are you alone?  Are people nearby?   Be able to explain why the attributes you’ve chosen are important, why it’s a good thing that you’re positioned where you are and why the proximity of your competitors is near or far.

Now it’s time for me to self-illustrate with Learning How...  I’m not going to use the names of any other books because I don’t want to pick on anyone and my visual issues have prevented me from doing the thorough reading/research you should do if you’re able – I’ve just skimmed the back of the books and tried to gather the information I could.  So here are my attributes:

I’m defining the field as the near-death/inspirational narrative book genre, and the two attributes I’m dealing with today are:

1)  Readability:  Quality of the text is important because Learning How… is a book – people will experience it through reading.  There is a lot of good writing out there and a lot of bad writing.  Few people who have a real-life story they want to tell are equipped to write it themselves – many people often use a ghostwriter to help them tell their story since this action will result in a better quality product.  Good move, I think – it is a better decision to work with a professional who has a demonstrable command of the English language than to go it on your own and make your reader suffer through ill-thought out text.  Many people with a story to tell have amazing skills they have cultivated instead of writing, so it makes sense that they would enlist some professional help when the time came to write a book.

Have you ever read bad writing?  I have.  It’s like scraping fingernails on a chalkboard. You are bound to come up against it at work or school – the painfulness of these experiences are proof enough that you do not want to make your reader suffer.

Now I’m going to toot my own horn a bit for the purposes of this illustration:  I know how to write.  A bunch of MCPS Teachers and Professors at Georgetown (COL ’02) made sure of this and I hope that whatever I produce will be a credit to them in terms of the quality of writing.  My writing “voice” is what it sounds like if we were speaking face to face, at least that’s what I’m going for – this, plus occasional brain lapses that may or may not be related to the injury are my excuses for my grammatical errors and colloquialisms.  I told you I’d learn the grammar on Youtube on Monday before teaching it at ESL on Tuesday.  Overall, though, it’s a blessing that I can just talk/write and words come out because my impairments do not allow for a whole lot of revision.  Or any revision, really – so I’ve been told that the chapters of my “Memoirs” are kind of like blog posts.  I figure I’m okay with that since people have short attention spans and I can’t really weave together a cool structure at this point.  It is what it is.  And there’s also the problem of me being asleep for the first few chapters, so they’re necessarily short.  I have, however, addressed this issue by adding in some real-time updates written by Tanpo and Boo Boo (my sister, Ai Ai).

So there’s no ghostwriter here, and (I hope) no bad writing.  You’re getting this from the horse’s mouth.  (Not Ed, but me…it’s just an expression.)  There is no middleman – the thoughts are 100% raw from me to you.

2)  Palatability

By “palatability” I mean to what extent does a book appeal to general tastes.  The inspirational genre I’ve parked myself in often smiles on uplifting stories that make you feel good by illustrating the triumph of the human spirit.

I’m conflicted over this one.  In a way, Learning How… is extremely unpalatable – I mean how instead of sending me to the mission field God put me in a wheelchair.  (I usually do not verbalize this part of my medical history to providers since it’s rather a downer.)   But on the upside, being unpalatable puts Learning How… in a quadrant with few if any competitors.  This goes back to the “badness” concept.  In a certain way, I’m depending on people’s instinctive desire to rubberneck to drum up some interest.  So yeah – it looked really bad to me.  Before I woke up I mouthed the word “Why” a lot and for a few days I was thrashing about in my bed, clearly extremely agitated and kicking my legs since that was the only thing I could do.

That’s when Timmy told Ai Ai he thought she should go out to OR to be with me and support our parents, and she flew to PDX, expecting me to still be closed-eyed and upset.  But she was in for a SURPRISE!  Because I woke up the day before her arrival and when she walked in to my room at Vibra (2^nd hospital) I was in the middle of PT and was able to give her a hug.  I was so loopy I thought I was dreaming so I just talked (very softly and laboriously) and laughed with her – business as usual!

So the part where I surprise my sister and we laugh like hyenas for 3 straight days is actually very palatable, but she had been steeling herself to be an emotional bolster for our family in a very unpalatable situation.

Upon reflection, my whole refusal to believe what happened is kind of sad (and unpalatable).  People told Mommy that they were deeply touched when Daddy wrote that email saying I had asked Mommy in the garden if we were dealing in reality and not a dream, and she told me it was for real.  In hindsight it is a little heartbreaking.  I honestly didn’t know and asked Mommy to tell me the truth.  I only half believed her, though – I decided later that if we were all in my dream of course she’d say this was reality.

So why read Learning How…?  Not to torture yourself because it’s like a wreck you can’t look away from.  Yes, this is one of those cases in which truth is stranger than fiction – but this really happened (wanna see Tanpo’s video montages?) and I’m just recording the events that unfolded.  So you’re in for the voyeurism/entertainment value occasioned by the severity of my illness and my refusal to believe what happened once I woke up and entered the Rehabilitation Process (and might have given a lot of people a (mildly) hard time).  Let me say again, this is not a feel-good story about the triumph of the human spirit.  It’s about how God took away my old life, eliminated the possibility of giving me the life I wanted, and how He gave me a heart transplant so I can look to the future with hope, not because of some promise of future good He communicated to me supernaturally before I woke up, but based on all of the publicly-available information I knew about in my old life and that was motivating me to go to Africa.

Pfewf – that was a long sentence, but I had to get that off my chest.  A few paragraphs ago I said I was “conflicted” over the attribute of “palatability.”  I’ve tried to explain above that Learning How… is, in a way, extremely unpalatable in that if you just look at what happened before Decision Day (when God answered all my questions on July 24, 2011), you’d have the script for a movie about why NOT to trust Him.  But if you follow the story a little longer you’ll understand why I think He was saying I did not forget you.  I did this on purpose.  You can trust Me. 

Still, the story is kind of…extreme.  I mean, if people read inspirational fare they want to feel good so they have more energy to face daily life– how will they relate to such a downer and such a statistically unlikely event? I’ll go into this more in a later post re. “Who are your customers?” but let me tell you why I’m taking this very unpalatable experience and saying it’s relatable: All the skills that help me cope in RecoveryLand I used daily to cope with school, work etc. in my old life.  There is no new knowledge here, nor was any “special” knowledge communicated to me in the Valley of the Shadow.  More to come!!

PS.  If you’re wondering when Learning How… will be publicly available, I’m aiming for Thanksgiving…(but that’s what I said last year, too)…I move kind of slowly now, but I’m trying, I really am.  xoxo

Part 1:  What is your elevator pitch?

209. Food for Thought: When Launching a Business (Series Part 3) – Finances

Many people are artists, inventors, designers, visionaries and want to leave “bean-counting” to someone else with a fancy looking calculator and a pocket protector.  Incidentally, I endured much good-natured ribbing since I used to carry around my old high-school graphing calculator. My colleagues joked that it had nuclear code capability. I was attached to it, though, since I was used to the buttons and knew where they were without looking.  My other favorite device in B-school was my handy number pad (the USB kind you plug into your laptop).  I got made fun of for using that, too, but I stick by my assertion that it makes number entry SO much faster.

If you fall into the category of person who would be amused by my calculator and number pad the important thing for you to do in answering Question 3 (“How do I approach finances?”) is to start approaching finances somehow.  I’m not going to be picky here – just buckle down and start thinking about it.  Don’t be scared.  You HAVE to do this in order to sustain the creative activity you are made for, so just start and you’ll feel so much better – when you have addressed finances you’ll feel free to attend to your core business.

So these thoughts are just starting points to help you not feel overwhelmed if you’ve decided to get a grip on your business’s finances and are not sure where to start.  Let me break this into two goals:

• Goal 1 (past-oriented records):  Keep your books clean so your accountant can work with them easily (I can’t help you here bc I always confuse debits and credits – accounting is not my forte).  Communicate with your accountant so you know what (s)he needs.  If you do not have a good accountant, make it a priority to get one – you need to be square with the government. Note:  If you cannot BE the ninja, KNOW the ninja.
• Goal 2 (future-looking projections):  Get a good idea of your revenue and expenses so you know if you’re going to make money in the future or not, and what you have to do to turn a profit.
  • Expense Categories:  Decide on categories that encompass all of your expenses. This will allow you to track them accurately as you sort every dollar that goes out the door into piles, and then size the piles so you know how much it costs to keep your venture running.  Examples:  Travel & Entertainment, Continuing Education/Licensing, Materials, Office Space Rental, Office Supplies, etc.
  • Revenue Unit:  What is a good “unit” to work with?  Depending on the business it could be a burrito, a book, or the hourly rate for an evening of babysitting.
  • What are the costs attached to each unit?  What is your pricing scheme?  Per room, a % of costs, etc.?

 A note on Pricing:  Do your homework and know what the market value of your product/service.  What are your competitors charging?  If you charge above this you should be able to clearly point to the extra value your business provides – the surcharge is simply the monetization of that extra value.  If you are charging below market value you must make sure that a) this price cut is NOT perceived by your customers as a discount for a product or service of inferior quality, and b) you can make up the deficit by the increased volume of sales you’ll see because of your low price strategy.

The goal is not to break even – it’s to turn a profit.  But it might take a while for this to happen, and it would be good theoretically to know how many sales you must make to break even since it’s a good mental milestone.  You just want to make sure you’re not throwing money at a losing proposition for X years while your family goes hungry because you’re busy pursuing your dream but have counted the cost ineptly.  If your dependents are extremely supportive of your dream and are okay with making some sacrifices in order to see it become a reality, that’s wonderful – but you still want to have some sort of idea of how long they are going to have to tighten their belts so you can make an informed decision regarding whether or not to take the plunge.

49. Did she really just say that?

It’s time for me to self-illustrate, but I can’t this time because 100% of the profits from Learning How… (in any format or language) will go to a good cause.  I am not sure of the language to use – I mean to say that they will go to a government-recognized organization that is non-profit or not-for-profit.  The funds will not be going to the Charity of Me.  Although I’ve heard of many people who, when faced with unexpected illness, accept donations for their medical/living expenses – and this is a good thing since if you can’t work bc you’re injured/sick, where are you and your family supposed to get money from?  If I were in this kind of situation I’d tell you.  But I have been blessed to be in a situation that does not necessitate fundraising (at present). Instead, I’ll offer you a product (my “Memoirs”) in return for a price – it’s your decision whether or not to purchase.  As I’ve said before, there’s actually very little overlap between this blog and my “Memoirs” – I know, you’re like, Seriously?  What else could she possibly have to say?  Answer:  Many, many things.

To be clear, Ed Goes to D.C. and anything else I come up with are not part of my “Memoirs”  (right now I’ve got Volume 1 written, and am waiting for more stuff to happen so I can write Volume 2). All revenue will be categorized and recognized appropriately – don’t worry, Tanpo is going to help me.  One more thing – I mentioned different formats/languages in the paragraph above.  I have enlisted some multilingual friends who will graciously translate Learning How… into Mandarin and Spanish.  I also researched options for a low-tech audio book and figured it would be a good use for my voice if I did it myself, plus I’d love to offer an accessible option like this…but given my upcoming vocal cord intervention I’m having second thoughts.

Don’t you love how I’m referring to it as “intervention” and not “surgery”?  Aaah – the soothing use of euphemisms helps me face the reality that I’m going back to the hospital without really facing it.  But this is exactly what I’m telling you NOT to do – don’t practice avoidance like I do – just jump into the financial pool.  The shock of the water might take an adjustment but you’ll feel more comfortable once you just climb in.  Don’t just get your toes wet, either – do a cannonball.  Better you than me.  🙂

 

 

 

204. Food For Thought: When Launching a Business [Series part 2]

Before you enter the field you want to know who’s already there and if your product/service is good enough to hold its own.  Do your homework!  The internet makes it easy to get a good start – Google, Amazon, etc. will give you an overview.  You should also go to some sites that people interested in your field congregate at and see what they’re talking about – e.g. is there a cool new product Moms are talking about on a popular Mommy blog?  Are tufted fabric headboards popular now, or do people like wooden ones?  How do men carry things when they travel without carrying a purse?  If the messenger bag is a popular solution, what kinds of options are already in the market?

If your offering is a product you could also go to the store and just look at what’s already on the shelves at local big box retailers.  Would yours be a compelling option to a consumer pushing a cart down that aisle?  (We’re suspending reality a moment and pretending you’re so amazingly fortunate as to have your product in a hard-to-break into distribution channel; seriously, though – if you can’t imagine your product being a fantastic option on that shelf you’ll have nothing to say to the stores’ merchandise buyers, so definitely ask yourself this question.

If your offering is a service make sure you know who your competitors are and why you can do the job better than they can.  There could be some debate on this point, but you probably don’t want to alienate your competitors by saying things like, “You are awful at what you do,” or telling prospective customers that everyone else is amazingly incompetent because it’s possible you could need their help in the future, or a collaboration might be in order on a project one day.  So play nice, but position yourself well so you can play hard.    You’re playing for keeps here – this is your livelihood we’re talking about, and you could have a family of people depending on you.

An easy way to visualize the playing field and your position on it is to draw a picture.  I think a concept exists for illustrating several attributes at once (a “spider chart”), but this is too intricate for me to dive into now.  For ease of use and clarity of thought, let’s look at a simple attribute chart.  Pick 2 attributes that are important and draw an x-y axis with negative space so you have quadrants.

To illustrate – let me refresh your memory on Parking 101.  This is not strictly an attribute map of a “playing field,” but I just want to show you what I mean by “negative space” and “quadrants” – sorry, I don’t know how to describe it.

Now put points on your attribute map representing the key players on the field and add one for yourself.  Are you alone?  Are people nearby?   Be able to explain why the attributes you’ve chosen are important, why it’s a good thing that you’re positioned where you are and why the proximity of your competitors is near or far.

Now it’s time for me to self-illustrate with Learning How...  I’m not going to use the names of any other books because I don’t want to pick on anyone and my visual issues have prevented me from doing the thorough reading/research you should do if you’re able – I’ve just skimmed the back of the books and tried to gather the information I could.  So here are my attributes:

I’m defining the field as the near-death/inspirational narrative book genre, and the two attributes I’m dealing with today are:

1)  Readability:  Quality of the text is important because Learning How… is a book – people will experience it through reading.  There is a lot of good writing out there and a lot of bad writing.  Few people who have a real-life story they want to tell are equipped to write it themselves – many people often use a ghostwriter to help them tell their story since this action will result in a better quality product.  Good move, I think – it is a better decision to work with a professional who has a demonstrable command of the English language than to go it on your own and make your reader suffer through ill-thought out text.  Many people with a story to tell have amazing skills they have cultivated instead of writing, so it makes sense that they would enlist some professional help when the time came to write a book.

Have you ever read bad writing?  I have.  It’s like scraping fingernails on a chalkboard. You are bound to come up against it at work or school – the painfulness of these experiences are proof enough that you do not want to make your reader suffer.

Now I’m going to toot my own horn a bit for the purposes of this illustration:  I know how to write.  A bunch of MCPS Teachers and Professors at Georgetown (COL ’02) made sure of this and I hope that whatever I produce will be a credit to them in terms of the quality of writing.  My writing “voice” is what it sounds like if we were speaking face to face, at least that’s what I’m going for – this, plus occasional brain lapses that may or may not be related to the injury are my excuses for my grammatical errors and colloquialisms.  I told you I’d learn the grammar on Youtube on Monday before teaching it at ESL on Tuesday.  Overall, though, it’s a blessing that I can just talk/write and words come out because my impairments do not allow for a whole lot of revision.  Or any revision, really – so I’ve been told that the chapters of my “Memoirs” are kind of like blog posts.  I figure I’m okay with that since people have short attention spans and I can’t really weave together a cool structure at this point.  It is what it is.  And there’s also the problem of me being asleep for the first few chapters, so they’re necessarily short.  I have, however, addressed this issue by adding in some real-time updates written by Tanpo and Boo Boo (my sister, Ai Ai).

So there’s no ghostwriter here, and (I hope) no bad writing.  You’re getting this from the horse’s mouth.  (Not Ed, but me…it’s just an expression.)  There is no middleman – the thoughts are 100% raw from me to you.

2)  Palatability

By “palatability” I mean to what extent does a book appeal to general tastes.  The inspirational genre I’ve parked myself in often smiles on uplifting stories that make you feel good by illustrating the triumph of the human spirit.

I’m conflicted over this one.  In a way, Learning How… is extremely unpalatable – I mean how instead of sending me to the mission field God put me in a wheelchair.  (I usually do not verbalize this part of my medical history to providers since it’s rather a downer.)   But on the upside, being unpalatable puts Learning How… in a quadrant with few if any competitors.  This goes back to the “badness” concept.  In a certain way, I’m depending on people’s instinctive desire to rubberneck to drum up some interest.  So yeah – it looked really bad to me.  Before I woke up I mouthed the word “Why” a lot and for a few days I was thrashing about in my bed, clearly extremely agitated and kicking my legs since that was the only thing I could do.

That’s when Timmy told Ai Ai he thought she should go out to OR to be with me and support our parents, and she flew to PDX, expecting me to still be closed-eyed and upset.  But she was in for a SURPRISE!  Because I woke up the day before her arrival and when she walked in to my room at Vibra (2^nd hospital) I was in the middle of PT and was able to give her a hug.  I was so loopy I thought I was dreaming so I just talked (very softly and laboriously) and laughed with her – business as usual!

So the part where I surprise my sister and we laugh like hyenas for 3 straight days is actually very palatable, but she had been steeling herself to be an emotional bolster for our family in a very unpalatable situation.

Upon reflection, my whole refusal to believe what happened is kind of sad (and unpalatable).  People told Mommy that they were deeply touched when Daddy wrote that email saying I had asked Mommy in the garden if we were dealing in reality and not a dream, and she told me it was for real.  In hindsight it is a little heartbreaking.  I honestly didn’t know and asked Mommy to tell me the truth.  I only half believed her, though – I decided later that if we were all in my dream of course she’d say this was reality.

So why read Learning How…?  Not to torture yourself because it’s like a wreck you can’t look away from.  Yes, this is one of those cases in which truth is stranger than fiction – but this really happened (wanna see Tanpo’s video montages?) and I’m just recording the events that unfolded.  So you’re in for the voyeurism/entertainment value occasioned by the severity of my illness and my refusal to believe what happened once I woke up and entered the Rehabilitation Process (and might have given a lot of people a (mildly) hard time).  Let me say again, this is not a feel-good story about the triumph of the human spirit.  It’s about how God took away my old life, eliminated the possibility of giving me the life I wanted, and how He gave me a heart transplant so I can look to the future with hope, not because of some promise of future good He communicated to me supernaturally before I woke up, but based on all of the publicly-available information I knew about in my old life and that was motivating me to go to Africa.

Pfewf – that was a long sentence, but I had to get that off my chest.  A few paragraphs ago I said I was “conflicted” over the attribute of “palatability.”  I’ve tried to explain above that Learning How… is, in a way, extremely unpalatable in that if you just look at what happened before Decision Day (when God answered all my questions on July 24, 2011), you’d have the script for a movie about why NOT to trust Him.  But if you follow the story a little longer you’ll understand why I think He was saying I did not forget you.  I did this on purpose.  You can trust Me. 

Still, the story is kind of…extreme.  I mean, if people read inspirational fare they want to feel good so they have more energy to face daily life– how will they relate to such a downer and such a statistically unlikely event? I’ll go into this more in a later post re. “Who are your customers?” but let me tell you why I’m taking this very unpalatable experience and saying it’s relatable: All the skills that help me cope in RecoveryLand I used daily to cope with school, work etc. in my old life.  There is no new knowledge here, nor was any “special” knowledge communicated to me in the Valley of the Shadow.  More to come!!

PS.  If you’re wondering when Learning How… will be publicly available, I’m aiming for Thanksgiving…(but that’s what I said last year, too)…I move kind of slowly now, but I’m trying, I really am.  xoxo

Part 1:  What is your elevator pitch?