84. “I come in peace.”

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Ezra loves to play with his Buzz Lightyear dolls.  That’s right – I’m talking about a plurality of dolls.  He has two – one plush and one plastic/motorized.  The plastic one talks and says some of Buzz’s famous lines.  Ezra likes to quote one in particular.  A while ago he told Mommy, “I come in peace,” and then, grinning cheekily, “No, I don’t come in peace!”

Well, at least he’s stating his intentions up-front.  It makes everything easier if you are clear about the action you’re about to take.  You’re much less likely to meet with resistance when you’re in the middle of something.

I’ve looked at the wall hangings in several hospitals and it’s generally recommended that when a medical professional enters your room (s)he should scrub his/her hands with the alcohol foam on the wall (I love that part) so the patient/family sees the cleansing process, and then identify him/herself.  For example, “I’m Nurse Ann. I’m going to take your vitals.”

Everyone pretty much followed this practice when I lived in the hospital, although my level of confusion was high enough to merit some extra questions on my part.  One morning, (early, I thought) a lady came to draw my blood.  I was just beginning to think my situation was real so I figured I had better assert myself and let people know I was paying attention and wasn’t going to let anyone poke me without just cause.  So I just asked her why she was drawing my blood, etc. (I had likely been told, but had forgotten.)  I think it was for a nutritional test.  I passed with flying colors.

But my nutritional level was not the only thing illuminated by my blood sample that morning.  Right after the lady exited the lights flickered on again and OT3 entered.  “Ni – ing,” she called in a funny sing-song voice, “I know you’re awake – the bloodsuckers were just in here.”  I couldn’t deny it.  OT3 had seen evidence of my early morning blood-sample with her own eyes.  She told me she had been trolling the halls for a while trying to find a patient who was willing to be awake and ready to dress.

I wasn’t thrilled to be the Chosen One but OT3 always made me laugh so I got out of bed and into my clothes like a good girl, and with no regret for my “lost” sleep. It turns out that humor can make a whole lot of things more tolerable.